App Etiquette

[J 01001010]

With these apps you end up getting to know people to varying degrees you’ve never met face-to-face. It’s a party, a dating app, a news station, comedy show, and a popularity contest all in one but sometimes real connections can come from it. Even when you meet someone face-to-face you often still end up talking on apps and getting to know them to a certain extent through them. You can potentially find your person, network with people that have similar interests, learn things and do business. However, there’s also a lot of games, manipulation, non-sense, and toxicity on these apps. In general I don’t take it too seriously, but real time is being spent and people have a form of access to me. Access can also be influence. That’s where the issue is.

I click the button but I don’t really “follow” anyone. If you’re a woman who wants to be close to me you should follow my lead anyway. Some people I “follow” because I found them attractive or they seemed cool, or we’re friends or just to support. I may never talk to them. Then there are a few I have a connection with or see potential to have a deeper connection with. It may or may not work out. There is a such thing as respectfully declining.. However, an unresponsive person is not even being a friend.

My tolerance level is at an all-time low for wishy washy. I’ve been rewarding bad behavior. I’m going to be more selective of who can even reach me or pop up in my feed. Some women especially get a form of power by gossiping about who’s in their likes or DMs, what they said to a man, who they ghosted, or who they blocked and spilling “the tea”. That’s what they use to entertain themselves and build their self-esteem and self-worth. Sub-consciously they think by tearing down men they elevate themselves. This may be true in the eyes of some women but it diminishes them in my eyes as a man and those are the ones I don’t want around. I appreciate women that are the opposite and don’t need everyone’s attention for validation. It’s not every woman that does that and I’m not doing that, but from now on after one or two unanswered messages I’m unfollowing. Then they can gossip, block, unfollow, or follow, who cares. It really should have always been like that but sometimes I like and love more than I should.

Nobody owes me a response, but I don’t owe anyone my attention either. Maybe it’s dislike; maybe it’s other people; maybe it’s confusion; maybe it’s ego. There’s always going to be unknowns. The reason doesn’t really matter if its not expressed and I’m not spending any time trying to figure it out. If I message you a couple times and you saw it and you chose to disregard it after a couple days that’s grace enough. Any dismissive or flaky behavior is a form of disrespect and should come with an apology and change to make amends. Otherwise it’s a goodbye.

For my own peace of mind if I feel disregarded or mistreated by someone I care about I don’t even want to see their picture anymore. Outside of a page that’s providing me with some education there’s no reason to “follow” or care about what an unresponsive woman eats, thinks, or does in her life.  Peace and love but I don’t want those kinds of distractions.

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