Legally I can go and have sex with as many women as will allow me to, and in society, as a man, I am highly encouraged to do so. If I go and impregnate multiple women and never see them again it’s perfectly legal also as long as I pay child support. However, if more than one woman agrees to be my wife and I claim them as my wives it’s a considered a crime. If I sleep with a lot of women, I’m a player or a ladies man and it’s no problem but if I marry more than one woman I’m a male chauvinist. So in practice, in the west, it is encouraged for men to sleep with as many women as possible as long as we discard them.

These western sensibilities often affect the way Christians see right and wrong.  We are encouraged to see men and women as equal in any area where women want to be seen as equal though this has never been the norm throughout human history or scripture. This is at the heart of why western nations are against polygamy. Even though the Bible never prohibits having multiple wives, some will say it is adultery. However, the biblical definition of adultery, a covenantal violation, as a man is having sex with another man’s wife or putting a wife away without just cause.

The story of Abraham and Sarah is often mentioned as being an example against polygamy. Sarah in her old age is told she will bear a child. She lacks faith and gives her servant to Abraham to bear a child who begets Ishmael leading to all the conflict we still see today. The problem was not that he had a second wife but that Sarah laughed at God like he didn’t know what he was talking about and made her own plan that Abraham went along with.

Jacob likewise never even wanted a polygamous relationship but he was given multiple wives and this was the founding of God’s chosen people. God would not make his covenant with a family that was against his will. Jacob loved Rachel and served Laban for the right to marry her but was tricked into marrying Leah first. Leah ends up being the father of Levi, who would later become the priestly class and Judah who was the ancestor of the kings and Jesus himself. Rachel ends up being the mother of Joseph who finds favor with God and saves the whole family. So no one can say both these marriages weren’t blessed and part of God’s plan.

The story of David best illustrates that God is not against polygamy. David already had more than one wife when he slept with Bathsheba. He was punished not for having multiple wives but because he committed adultery as she was already married. Furthermore when the prophet Nathan brought the word of God to him he said:

“2 Samuel 12:8 And I gave thee thy master’s house and thy master’s wives into thy bosom, and gave thee the house of Israel and of Judah; and if that had been too little, I would moreover have given unto thee such and such things.”

This scripture clearly says God gave David multiple wives of his masters (who were dead) and God would have given him even more. So it makes no sense to say God is against polygamy. He would not give multiple wives to David if it was a sin.

King Solomon had hundreds of wives and concubines. This is the biggest bible story used to say that polygamy was prohibited. Solomon, was punished not for having multiple wives but because he took pagan wives who he allowed to influence him to participate in idol worship.

Isaiah 4:1 says: And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying, We will eat our own bread, and wear our own apparel: only let us be called by thy name, to take away our reproach.

If you look at the context of this verse, this is because many of the men have been killed and society is a situation where women have began ruling and carrying themselves shamefully and children have become the oppressors. Sounds very familiar.

Now if we go to the New Testament, there are two main verses that are used to say Polygamy is not allowed in Christianity:

Matthew 19:4-6

“Haven’t you read,” he replied, that at the beginning the Creator made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be United to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

19:9: And I say to you, Whoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.

1 Timothy 3:2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilante, sober, of good behavior, given to hospitality, apt to teach.

The verses in Matthew are speaking specifically about marriage being a covenant that should not be broken. The verse in Timothy is specifically to be a bishop. So if you have more than one wife you cannot be a bishop. However we never see anyone throughout the scriptures condemned for having more than one wife.

That really ends any debate from a biblical standpoint. Modern ideology is what has women pastoring churches with men sitting in the congregation, literally and figuratively, when it is specifically forbidden. The same attitude of “I don’t care what scripture says, God told me…” opens the door for lgbt pastors and every other abomination.  God is not going to tell anyone to go against his word.

The scriptures show the ideal is one man and one woman just as it is the ideal to be a virgin when married. However due to death, imprisonment, infertility and other situations society is far from ideal. There are generally less eligible men to marry than women. Then even among men women would consider eligible many men have no desire for marriage and only want short term encounters. There is already a form of polygamy in western society with all kinds of blended families. I hear some people using polygamy as code word for just rotating people in and out of their life but that’s not what it is or should be. It is really just a means for women to be protected and provided for and allows women to share responsibilities for giving birth and raising families. I’m seeing more and more women who are open to it or even prefer it. This is likely because woman feel a different type of safety having other women close by and being able to socialize and share experiences with them in a different way than what they would do with a man. It’s not right for everyone and some people will never get married at all, but polygamy is not prohibited and can be the best option for some people in certain circumstances.